


Just the same but brand new

by firebrands



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Idiots in Love, M/M, Self-Esteem Issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-23
Updated: 2019-08-23
Packaged: 2020-09-24 15:37:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,286
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20360920
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/firebrands/pseuds/firebrands
Summary: So here are the facts:Truth #1: Steve likes Tony.Truth #2: Steve's pretty sure Tony likes him back.The lie? That they shouldn't be together.Stony Bingofill for the prompt “two truths and a lie”title from thisSt. Vincent song:)





	Just the same but brand new

They’d been at this dance for a while, toeing the line of friendly and pulling back before it could possibly be described as something else. There are times when Tony’s hand brushes against his when they walk. There are times when Steve feels brave enough to drape his arm across Tony’s shoulders while they watch a movie. Following this, Tony sometimes leans in closer, his arm resting against Steve’s chest. It’s casual. It’s fine.

At least, until Tony gets hit by an EMP during what they’d all made the mistake of assuming was a standard op. Then, Tony’s hurtling down to the concrete, gaining speed as gravity exerts itself. 

Steve is standing in the middle of the street feeling completely horrified at his uselessness, only realizing his mouth was open when it snaps shut as Thor catches Tony mid-air.

Of course Tony doesn’t want to talk about it after. He’s back to his old self, all quips and bluster, as they help him onto the jet. 

Steve tries not to be too overt with his relief—reminds himself to aim for Strictly Friendly. Still, Steve’s the only one who knows the latches in Tony’s armor and  _ hey, isn’t that a great metaphor _ , Steve thinks ruefully as he watches his hands fumble around the metal. So maybe they’re shaking a little as he helps Tony lift the helmet off.  _ So what.  _

Tony says something about finally getting some AC, wiping his brow dramatically of sweat as reassures all of them that he’s  _ fine, really, _ and then need to kiss Tony square on the mouth surges out of Steve so suddenly he physically reels back as he reminds himself that that isn’t allowed.

Tony smiles up at Steve, brow quirked at the sudden distance between them.

Steve tugs at the collar of his uniform, feeling too hot, all of the sudden. He clears his throat, and his heart is beating hard against his chest. There’s a name for what he feels, he  _ knows _ that. There are words for the trust between them, for the way they continue to play in the space of plausible deniability, for the fact that Tony reaches out to Steve, and without having to say a word, Steve sits beside Tony, lays his hand against Tony’s armored thigh because he knows it gives Tony a measure of comfort.

So maybe there’s one word, specifically, for all those things. And today, of all days, Steve has finally realized he needs to say the word out loud. Or at least, get them to a place when he finally can.

*

Steve finds Tony in his workshop (of course), drawing up calculations against what happened earlier in the day.

Tony notices Steve standing behind him and tells JARVIS to run the tests before he turns toward Steve. “What’s up?”

Steve sighs. He’s tired from the fight, yes, and tired at the thought of this conversation. But he knows, too, that it can’t be the same, not anymore. It was different, a few years ago, with the wormhole and the near death experience—they weren’t friends, then. They didn’t share all those nights together, didn’t wait for each other during meals, didn’t find themselves drawn to each other, seeking companionship over individual (and later, shared) trauma, didn’t know they would ever find comfort in each other. That was then.

This is now. 

“I wanted to talk,” Steve says, because there’s no other way to start this. “I wanted to tell you something.”

Tony’s mouth quirks down into a frown, assessing him. “Okay. So say something,” he says, before laughing a little, to diffuse the tension quickly settling into the air.

Steve takes a deep breath. “I like you. More than a friend. And I’d like to go out with you,” Steve says, voice measured and calm with the assurance that he’s doing the right thing. (And somewhere, inside, reassured as well that the feeling isn’t his alone.) 

“If you’d like,” he adds, a second later. “If you... like.”

Tony stares at him, opens his mouth and closes it, a few times. “I—what?” 

“Please don’t make me say it again,” Steve says, feeling a flush rise up his neck, up his cheeks, suddenly fearful—he thinks, with a touch of hysteria:  _ I can’t have been wrong _ . 

“No, no, I—” Tony stutters, which adds to the surreality of the situation. Tony doesn’t stutter. Ever. “ _ Steve _ ,” he says, tone imploring.

“What?” Steve asks, because he didn’t bare his heart for nothing. “I don’t understand. Do you not feel the same way?”

Tony squeezes his eyes shut, scrubs his face with a hand. “You’re not kidding.”

“No.”

“That is a colossally bad idea.” 

“No it isn’t,” Steve scoffs. He’s a bit annoyed, now, because of how confused he feels.

Tony throws his hands up in the air. “You can’t date me!”

“Why not?”

“Why—” Tony exhales loudly, sounding exasperated. “I’m _horrible _at relationships!” Tony drags his hands down his face. “Seriously! Look at my track record!”

Steve moves toward Tony, taking his hands in his. “Stop it,” he says gently. He wants nothing more than to kiss the worry from Tony’s face, to tell him how the way he sees him is so diametrically opposed to how he sees himself.

Tony pulls his hands away and begins wringing them.

“You don’t like me,” he whispers, more to himself than to Steve.

“But I do,” Steve says, smiling at Tony as he raises a hand to cup Tony’s chin. “I do.”

Tony shakes his head.

“Okay,” Steve says, drawing his hand away. He takes a step back and switches gears: “Do you not like me?”

“Do I not _like—_” Tony lets out another exasperated huff of breath. “Jesus, Steve, I—”

Steve watches him, doesn’t say anything as he waits for Tony to finally finish a sentence.

“Of course I like you!”

“Good," Steve says, laughing a little as the giddy excitement bubbles out of him. "Good."

“Not good!” Tony says, pacing around. “Totally not good.”

“Why not?”

“I’m not—” Tony stops and takes a steadying breath. “I don’t like me,” he says, finally stopping his pacing to stand in front of Steve. “For you,” he adds quietly. 

“I think I get to decide that,” Steve says, taking Tony’s hands in his.

Tony shakes his head. “You’re wrong,” he mumbles.

Steve shrugs. “Been wrong about a lot of things, Tony,” he says. “I don’t think I’m wrong about you.”

“Who taught you to be so smooth?” Tony’s laugh is small, but Steve is happy to hear it.

“I like you.” Steve says, pulling Tony close. “You like me,” he adds, wrapping his arms around Tony’s waist. “True?”

“True,” Tony says, looking put out. “But we shouldn’t be together,” he says, ducking his head down to avoid Steve’s eyes.

“Lie,” Steve whispers, placing a hand under Tony’s chin to tilt his face up. He looks at Tony, grateful to see him up close like this—grateful for the permission to look at him this way. He searches Tony’s eyes for hope, and finds them. 

“We should,” he says, before pulling Tony in for a kiss. 

Tony pulls away, breathless. “Things will change,” he says, tightening the fist he’s formed around Steve’s shirt. “It won’t—”

“Of course it will,” Steve says, pressing is forehead against Tony’s. “I remember someone telling me change wasn’t always a bad thing,” he adds.

“I can’t believe you’re using my words against me,” Tony chuckles.

“Can’t help it, you say so many,” Steve quips.

“Ass,” Tony mutters, before closing the space between them. He hesitates a little before he presses a quick peck to Steve’s lips. 

Steve rubs Tony’s nose with his. “We’ll be fine," he says, and kisses Tony again. 

**Author's Note:**

> i'm on [tumblr](https://firebrands.tumblr.com/) and [twitter](https://twitter.com/firebrandss)!


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